fernlets:

negritudes:

support aces of colour who are struggling to reclaim their sexuality while being actively fetishized, hypersexualized, and/or desexualized based on their race and intersections of neuro-atypicality, physical disability, etc.

i’m op of this post (i’ve since changed my url) and the amount of bloggers who have reblogged this and tagged it with some variation of “thank you” shows you how important it is to recognize people of colour who are on the ace spectrum

the-ace-of-weasels:

the-ace-of-weasels:

I’ve seen a few people say on occasion that the fact aces feel “relieved” when they realize they’re ace is “telling” and imply it means being ace isn’t so bad.

let me tell you a thing.

I went years without one of my worst chronic illnesses being properly diagnossed. the day I got a formal diagnosis I felt relieved.

I felt relieved even tho I knew it still meant even with good insurance to help pay for the best treatment of it I’d still be dealing with debilitating levels of pain and fatigue. knowing that with my shitty insurance I would not be able to get the proper treatment to minimize it as much as possible. knowing that doctors don’t even know enough about what causes it let alone know how to fix it. knowing they know so little about it compared to something better studied that they’re still finding stuff out about the symptoms of it. knowing that some doctors and nurses still claim it’s a psychological condition. knowing I am going to live my whole life in moderate to severe pain and exhausted and never be able to live a normal life.

I felt relieved because I had a name for it, because that gave me a source of support. I could use the internet to communicate with other people who had it and get support and knowledge of their experiences with it from them. because it made me feel less alone.

that relief didn’t make what I deal with any better, it was because it gave me a frame of reference, made me feel less alone, and helped me find support from other people who experience the same thing.

I implore you people who think the fact asexuals feel relieved when they realize they’re asexual to think on this.

since this has started happening again I think it fair to reblog this and remind people this same “the fact aces feel relieved when they realize they’re ace means they’re not LGBT+” BS was already pulled over a year ago and they’re just recycling an old tune.

the-unapologetic-ace:

What a great day to remember that asexuality is a spectrum and one person who identifies as ace may have different experiences than another ace individual. There is not a specific check list of experiences asexuals have to have in order to be considered valid.

asexualartists:

Today we’re joined by Abby Ramsay. Abby is a phenomenal model and actress in LA. She uses her art to raise awareness of issues close to her heart. Her Instagram has recently blown up a bit after she gave an interview about social media. Abby is a fellow ace feminist, which is always awesome to see. She’s incredibly passionate, as you’ll soon read. My thanks to her for taking the time to participate in this interview.

WORK

Please, tell us about
your art.

Well, I am an actress and model out in LA. I show off my
work mostly through Instagram. Just creating these images and stories, whether
they be moving or still, really gives me this outlet to express my thoughts,
feelings, and ideals that I can’t always put into words.  

I like to use my art to bring attention to topics like
asexuality, body positivity, feminism, and mental illness as those are all
things that are close to me.

I also like combining them. Everything I do is done with the
mindset of “just because I am asexual does not mean I am not sexy or
desirable.” but also “Just because I am viewed as sexy or desirable does not
mean I can’t be asexual.”

What inspires you?

Just the idea that I can use what I love to help people. The
industry that I am in has the potential to have your voice be heard by many
people all over the world. If I have the opportunity to use my platform to
change it for the better then I want to do it.

What got you
interested in your field?  Have you
always wanted to be an artist?

I have been acting since I was about 5 years old. Granted at
the time the only reason I was in these musicals was because I was a really
good singer at a young age, but they fed my love of storytelling. I would
create plays at home and act them out for my parents, and it really blossomed
into a passion by middle school. I fought long and hard with my parents
(especially my mom) to let me try to get an agent, and they eventually gave in.
I was a freshman in High School (2012 I believe) when I was signed with a small
agency, and they sent me on my first few jobs. I was in love!

The agency also dealt with modeling, so the first photoshoot
I ever did was with them. I was really shy in front of the camera at first. I
had dealt with a lot of body positivity issues in the past, but the longer I
was in front of the camera the more I enjoyed it. I actually felt really
comfortable with myself.

Do you have any kind
of special or unique signature, symbol, or feature you include in your work
that you’d be willing to reveal?

Hmmmm. I guess I like to keep things natural. I have never
been an over the top character actor (I mean it’s fun, but I have my
preferences) so I usually try to take scenes to a more organic place. I do the
same thing with my modeling. I always try to get a few pictures that represent
me. There’s this idea that when you are modeling you can never smile and you
always have to be sultry, but when I am working and talking to the photographer
I like to smile and laugh and just be myself. Those end up being some of the
best pictures.

I also do this hand on head leaning back pose a LOT. My
friends give me a hard time about it haha. But it’s like my signature pose now
I guess.

What advice would you
give young aspiring artists?

It is not going to be easy, but with hard work, dedication, and a
little bit of luck you can make your art your life.

ASEXUALITY

Where on the spectrum
do you identify?

I usually just say I am asexual, but for me that means that
I don’t find people sexually attractive, and I am just not interested in sex.
I’m not sex repulsed and I am aesthetically and romantically attracted to
people, but I would much rather kiss and cuddle than have sex.

Have you encountered
any kind of ace prejudice or ignorance in your field?  If so, how do you handle it?

There have been a couple instances. When you have your work online,
you usually get some not so pleasant remarks from people. You get people who
want to “fix you” you which is the one that bothers me the most.

But even outside the internet, I have had some encounters
that have been less than ideal. I had a teacher at my college basically say
that I was too pretty to be asexual and that it would be a waste. I know she
didn’t mean it the way it came out, but it’s one of the reasons we need more
visibility.

I also had a fellow acting student come to the conclusion
that she did not like me because she thought asexuality was stupid. I never
quite understood the logic behind that.

And it’s also hard, especially in acting, because Hollywood
is so sexed up that there is just this assumption that every character
interaction is because they want to bone.

What’s the most
common misconception about asexuality that you’ve encountered?

OK, the idea that “you just haven’t found the right person
yet” or “you won’t know unless you try” pisses me off. I have gotten both and
my general response to that is “you could give me a cheap piece of raw fish or
a $200 piece of raw fish, it doesn’t chance that fact that I don’t like raw
fish.” and “I have never been shot before, but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t enjoy
that either.”

There is also the idea that if you have a mental illness or
if you have been in an abusive relationship or raped that your asexuality is
just a byproduct. You know, whether it is or isn’t that shouldn’t make their
identity any less legitimate.

What advice would you
give to any asexual individuals out there who might be struggling with their
orientation?

You are not broken. I promise you. Your feelings are
completely normal. You are a valid part of the LGBTQIA community, and though we
may be a smaller group, we are full of love, no matter where we fall on the
spectrum. Just be yourself.

Finally, where can
people find out more about your work?

My Instagram is abbysworldsastage.

Thank you, Abby, for participating in this interview and this project. It’s very much appreciated.